9 Ways to Increase Your Charisma

When Prince finished a showcase performance in a small Minneapolis movie theater on January 7, 1979, the Warner Records representatives walked out shaking their heads. Prince couldn’t believe it. Not ready for a tour? How was he supposed to sell any records?

But the label believed its new artist wasn’t a good enough performer to make a tour profitable. Prince was an excellent musician, they knew, but he lacked charisma. He needed to develop the ability to get people excited about his music by getting excited about him. Instead of signing off on a concert schedule, they sent him back to the studio to record a second album.

Prince made the album and, propelled by the success of its first single, “I Wanna Be Your Lover,” it entered the Billboard charts. Finally, Warner saw enough momentum to risk sending the still-awkward performer on the road. A lucky break came when singer Rick James, of “Super Freak” fame, invited Prince to open for him on his 1980 Fire It Up Tour.

“I felt sorry for him,” James later recalled. At first, anyway.

Prince began the tour with no knowledge of how to engage the crowd. But he was determined to improve, and he did. He schooled himself on how to be more charismatic on stage. He adopted the tactics of performers he admired, including James himself.

Prince believed that charisma could be practiced and perfected—and he was right.

By the end of that tour Prince commanded audiences, leading call-and-response chants, wowing them with dance moves, even flipping the microphone. Fans were so riled up by Prince’s performances, James felt overshadowed.

How did Prince get that good? By decoding—and mastering—the communication strategies that constitute a charismatic rock performance.

A team of management scholars headed by John Antonakis of the University of Lausanne Business School decided to do the samewith workplace charisma. They broke it down to a few concrete, learnable strategies, which they then taught to a group of randomly-selected middle managers through a five-hour group workshop and one-hour individual coaching session. Three months later, 360-degree evaluations revealed that the managers who had received the training were perceived as more charismatic, more competent, and more trustworthy on the job than before the intervention.(link is external with workplace charisma. They broke it down to a few concrete, learnable strategies, which they then taught to a group of randomly-selected middle managers through a five-hour group workshop and one-hour individual coaching session. Three months later, 360-degree evaluations revealed that the managers who had received the training were perceived as more charismatic, more competent, and more trustworthy on the job than before the intervention.Most advice for improving charisma consists of vague prescriptions like, "Show confidence.” But while it’s true that confidence increases perceptions of charisma, it's hard to fake. So is warmth, another common denominator of charismatic people. But the following tactics identified by Antonakis and colleagues are relatively easy to learn, adopt, and implement:

• Use metaphors. You use metaphors whenever you compare your group to an army on the march or a sports team. Lady Gaga uses metaphor when she refers to her fans as “Little Monsters.” Prince invoked a powerful metaphor when he appeared on television with the word “slave” written across his cheek. Metaphors are charismatic because they simplify and stir people’s emotions and imagination.
• Use stories and anecdotes. Personal stories can be used to great effect, especially stories of early struggles and challenges and how you overcame them. Rock stars use stories to make a stronger connection between their audience and their music. Paul McCartney, for example, introduces many live songs with an anecdote about the person the song is about. Others tell stories about things that happened to them in the town hosting the show.
• Show moral conviction. Moral significance makes your message more meaningful. By appealing to the “right thing to do,” you reinforce core shared values and stir others to action. Rock stars display moral conviction to strengthen their bond with their audience. U2 had fans march around the stage with pictures of then-imprisoned Aung San Suu Kyi on their 360-degree Tour. Madonna printed “Pussy Riot” on her back during her MDNA tour in support of the imprisoned Russian group. And late Beastie Boy Adam "MCA" Yauch organized the Tibetan Freedom concerts, rallying fans and fellow musicians for Tibetan independence.
• Express shared feelings as others. By revealing that you feel the same way as others do, you increase their identification with you. Statements such as, “I am just as overwhelmed as you are," or, "I am elated at this opportunity,” strengthen your emotional connection. Musicians also use shared feelings. Neil Young, though he's 68 years old, still acts like an “angry young man,” sharing feelings of disillusionment with his audiences.
• Set high expectations and communicate confidence. By expecting much from others and yourself, you inspire those around you to be more than they are now. But it’s not enough to set high expectations: You have to let others know that you believe in them. When Prince signed and produced the band The Time for Warner Brothers, he insisted that they improve their stage show. According to then-keyboard player Jimmy Jam, Prince insisted that all band members sing harmony and dance while they played. “That’s what Prince did, time and again,” Jam said. “He taught us we could do things we’d never believed we could.”
• Use contrasts to frame and focus messages. Contrasts are powerful rhetorical devices because they emphasize. Contrasting statements such as “Rather than counting how many hours you’ve put in, we care about how much value you create," or, "Most companies are letting people go but we’re hiring,” send a strong message. Rock stars do this, too: Madonna contrasts herself with Lady Gaga, singing “She’s not me!” on her MDNA tour. And Lady Gaga contrasts herself with performers who lip sync.
• Use lists. Lists boost charisma because they give the impression of completeness. They send a message that you have a coherent understanding of an issue. For example, when you say “The new rules will affect us in three major ways,” you position yourself as an expert on an unknown topic.
• Use rhetorical questions. Rhetorical questions draw other people in: “Is everyone having a good time tonight?” They also create anticipation. When you ask, “Where do we go from here?” you’ve got others hanging on every word.
• Use nonverbal strategies to animate your words. By animating your body language, you engage others. Body gestures, facial expressions, and a vocal tone that demonstrate passion leave more memorable impressions, whether on a stage or around a meeting table.

Prince is now one of pop’s greatest performers. He believed that charisma could be learned—and he proved it. And like him, you can learn to have a more powerful effect on others.

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10 Reasons Why Introverts Are Incredibly Attractive People

Introverts are often thought of as shy, aloof, disinterested and “stuck up” because they keep a low profile. But that assumption couldn’t be further from the truth. Think of James Bond for a moment.

Bond doesn’t always wear his emotions on his sleeve — or on his face. He is quiet, pensive, confident and driven. Do you think his demeanor makes him more or less attractive? His style makes him more attractive.

Similarly, introverts don’t center themselves as the life of the party, but they are among the most incredibly attractive and fascinating people you’ll ever meet. Here’s why:

1. They are mysterious

Introverts have an mysterious aura about them. People want to know what they are thinking, but will never know all of it. This makes introverts incredibly fascinating and intimidating at the same time. It is no wonder that they are so extremely misunderstood by the more outgoing and vocal people in our society.

2. They are easy to be around

It might surprise you, but introverts are some of the nicest and friendliest people you’ll ever meet. They are naturally chilled out, relaxed and loving. In a world that is always in a rush and that can’t stop talking and clamoring for the limelight, the introvert’s cool and laid-back nature is extremely appealing. It is true that introverts are drained by crowds, but they thrive in small groups and one-on-one interactions.

3. They are dreamers

Despite what you may have heard, dreaming is anything but a waste of time. Psychologist Scott Barry Kaufman and colleagues explain that a mind that wonders aids in the process of “creative incubation.” You may already know from experience that our best ideas come seemingly out of the blue when our minds are elsewhere.

Introverted people get lost in their minds often and come out of them with refreshing and wonderful ideas. When you are with them you are fascinated and feel like a part of the magic because of the way they treat you and let you in on intriguing, new possibilities.

4. They are good listeners

It seems everyone in our extroverted world today is preoccupied with themselves and what’s on their own mind. Every day is like a shouting contest where everyone wants to speak and no one wants to listen. So, when someone shows an interest in another and is willing to listen, it’s a huge attractor. Introverts listen more than they speak. They listen with the view to understand and not merely to reply. And that is incredibly rare and special. It boosts stronger connections and healthier relationships.

5. They are intrinsically motivated

As inwardly-oriented people, introverts tend to be intrinsically motivated. That means they are motivated to act by deeper, internal convictions rather than shallow, external motivations like reward and recognition.

They know who they are, what they want and what matters in their life. And that is why they are the ones most likely to pursue their true passions despite the risks and inconveniences involved. Anyone who is self-driven, motivated by higher values and passionate is undeniably attractive and inspiring.

6. They are observant

Introverts see things others often miss or don’t see. The world is an introvert’s wonderland with possibilities everywhere. They are constantly taking in information in their quiet state and using it as fodder for creative expression. When you are with an introvert, nothing is lost. And it often seems like the introverted person always knows what you want even when you haven’t spelled it out, which is brilliant and endearing.

7. They are mindful of what they say

Nothing makes you look stupid and unattractive faster than saying inappropriate things because you rushed to speak and did not take time to consider your words. Introverts don’t speak out of turn. In fact, they won’t speak at all unless they have something important to say. And when they do speak, they say just enough to pique your interest and leave you wanting more. The more they speak the more fascinated you become and the more you want to hear them speak.

8. They are creative, out-of-the box thinkers

According to studies by the psychologists Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi and Gregory Feist, the most spectacularly creative people in many fields are often introverted. That’s largely because solitude is a key ingredient for creative success. Introverts have no fear of being alone. They actually cherish privacy and freedom from interruption. In the state of solitude, introverts get in touch with their inner monologue, ask the right questions and flex their creative muscles.

Author Susan Cain notes that, “Without introverts, the world would be devoid of: the theory of gravity; the theory of relativity; W. B. Yeats’s “The Second Coming”; Chopin’s nocturnes; Proust’s In Search of Lost Time; Peter Pan…” and so on.

That natural tendency to embrace solitude, focus deeply on a subject, think and act creatively makes introverts, past and present, gloriously remarkable and attractive people.

9. They are studious and smart

Introverts are naturally drawn to reading and study. They enjoy learning and figuring out new things for themselves. And while they might be dubbed book worms, they are smart. And a smart person is sexy and attractive. You are better off spending time with someone who’s knowledgeable and eagerly interested in learning more, than someone who is ignorant and disinterested.

10. They are intellectually stimulating

Because introverts are studious and self-reflective, their conversations are intellectually stimulating. They know all kinds of things to share with others. And there is something magical and beautiful about someone who lights up and is energized by meaningful, intelligent conversations.

Just a little side note....most people with these zodiac signs tend to be introverts and sexy as hell! ^_*

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