5 habits of Authentic People

Hey everyone! I came across this awesome guy's channel on youtube and felt INSTANTLY inspired! He's like a Life Guru!! I've learned sooo much from his videos and had many "ah-ha" moments. 

The video you see above I felt would be perfect to share because I feel that ALL OF YOU can relate to this. Nowadays there's so many social media sites where people feel the need to keep posting about their lives and some people even FAKING their "awesome" lifestyles online just to show off to others in order to make themselves feel better...aka INSECURITY. I'm pretty sure you all know at least one person on facebook who keeps showing off their exaggerated lifestyles and solo pictures, better yet, their selfies just to get a whole bunch of likes and attention of course.

There's also pressure from society to look a certain way and act a certain way. I mean of course you have to follow the laws of society but you don't have to follow every trend that's out there! BE YOURSELF!!! You are BeYOUtiful (beautiful)!!! And there is MORE TO LIFE than just going to school and getting a degree. I'm not saying for you to NOT go to school and get a degree but you can do that PLUS more! Like have a business or businesses on the side...master at least 8 streams of income even while you have the College Degree! There are many who have gotten their degree and are STRUGGLING to pay the bills! I know a single mom who's a Registered Nurse making good money, yes, but she's got the mortgage to pay, water, heat, electricity, cable, groceries...you get my drift. She's so bombarded with bills to pay that she can't even go shopping for herself nor take a nice vacation! Pathetic lifestyle if you ask me. 

So what I'm saying here overall is that we need to be courageous enough to BE OURSELVES and stop trying to constantly "fit in" the crowd. I learned that when you feel as though you don't fit in, that's cuz you are OUTSTANDING!!! I mean how awesome is that?! I've learned to embrace feeling and being different from the rest. I know that I was created for a reason and to be outstanding and I am very PROUD of that (I have a Leo Rising btw)!!!

We must also learn to love ourselves! Stop relying on a man or woman to make you happy or feel "complete". Happiness is a choice and it only comes from WITHIN! I was watching Dr. Oz earlier today and Jennifer Lopez, better known as JLo, was a guest on his show and she was authentic as can be. Even before she said this I already knew it all along after hearing millions of stories of her several boyfriends over the years. She said that she learned this the hard way but she learned that she had to love herself. Hopping from one man to another trying to fill in voids was NOT the solution. As a result she kept choosing all the wrong men out there and as many of you have seen, none of those relationships lasted. Her wedding day with Ben Affleck was canceled, her marriage with Marc Anthony was toast and so forth. You have to love yourself FIRST and choose to be happy NOW. Like attracts like thus you will attract a man or woman who is already happy and loves themselves IF, only IF you are the same already. And don't RUSH into a relationship with them, take your time and GET TO KNOW them first!

I hope my words and this video got through to you. This is valuable advice that I was given over the years and it has prevented me from getting into any emotional turmoil. Boy am I super grateful for this! So LOVE YOURSELF, choose to be happy NOW and BE YOURSELF!!! 

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Using Facebook: narcissism or empathy?

The researcher from the University of North Florida have taken the quest to investigate the relationship among Facebook use to see if is encouraging selfishness or empathy. As we already discovered, what we see on Facebook and online, as resulted by a study conducted by Facebook, already influence the way we feel. But can be more as how the social media and the online influence our personality and the way we express ourselves?

The rise of social networking sites has led to changes in the nature of our social relationships, as well as how we present and perceive ourselves. Although social media, like Facebook, allow us to connect, are we becoming more self-centered and less empathic towards other human beings?

A new study by Dr. Tracy Alloway, an assistant professor of psychology at the University of North Florida, investigated the relationship among adult Facebook users, between ages 18 and 50, and found that some Facebook features are linked to selfishness and some Facebook activities may encourage empathy.

The study  showed that there were differences between the sexes. While men were more narcissistic according to the test, narcissistic women were more likely to rate their profile pictures as more physically attractive, glamorous and cool. Females also changed their profile picture more than the males, updating their photo once every two months, compared to once every three months for males. This may mean that narcissistic women are more likely to use Facebook as a reflecting pool than narcissistic males.

This is interesting from the point of view of the “social game”. After all, we all want from time to time to be in the center of attention, but it seems that women’s have a greater desire than men to be admired.

There may also be a problem of expressing the low self-esteem. Contrary to popular believes, low self-esteem is wide spread among the population, and the admiration of others can be used as a tool of rising the self-esteem. Women’s tends to tie the self-esteem to the looks and the people that admire them, but for the men self-esteem is tied up to success and the ability to provide for the family.

But let’s look at final conclusions of the study:

However, Alloway noted that many other Facebook activities weren’t linked to narcissism. “The number of friends they had, even how often they posted photos of themselves weren’t related to narcissistic tendencies,” she said. “This pattern suggests that while Facebook may be a tool for narcissists, it’s more than just a reflecting pool.”

Additionally, the findings indicated that some Facebook activities, such as chatting, were linked to aspects of empathic concern, such as higher levels of Perspective Taking — the ability to place oneself in another’s situation — in males, while females scored lower. The photo feature in Facebook was also linked to the better ability to place themselves, both males and females, in fictional situations. For females only, viewing videos was associated with the extent to which they could identify with someone’s distress.

The study’s conclusion found that some Facebook activities, such as chatting, encourage some aspects of empathy. Although the photo feature was linked to narcissism, the overall pattern of findings suggests that social media is primarily a tool for staying connected than for self-promotion.

We all try to promote ourselves, to market ourselves of you will, and social media is a great medium for that. We live in a competitive world, and we need the approval of others to increase our self-esteem, and more people are using social media for this. Also, the empathy element of facebook interaction can help you to better understand your peers and in the end be a better person for yourself and for the others.

But don’t forget: healthy self-esteem can only come from within, and you and only you are the master of your destiny.

Source: http://tinyurl.com/FacebookMentalEffects

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